Sunday, November 02, 2008

Reflections : My hope.....

When you realized that finality of life is not too far away, and like a game of cards, you are about to show hand, what would occupy your mind while awaiting that elusive road to take you home ? I guess, I would hope that the road that eventually lead you home is not a rough and torturous one, that it would be a smooth and painless passage with flowers on both sides. Of course, I must also have the faith to believe that everything will work out at the end of the day, that I will be healthy again, and live life happily ever after. See, despite all the fear for death or uncertainty, I do have a great sense of humors.

My sister sent me this little prayer...... “Father, thank You for Your calling on my life. I seek Your Complete Healing, strength, favor, and anointing. Free me from this cancer curse. Wash me clean with the blood of Christ. Others will come to know Jesus through my witness. In His name. Amen.” Well, I pray hard. But I also believe in helping myself by having faith in modern medicine. Sometimes, I do wonder, if the Almighty is so all knowing, all loving, and all powerful, why did he allow human being to suffer unnecessarily ? This is tthe part of spirituality I still find it difficult to comprehend.

Of late, I had also been thinking about my family. Would life be ever the same again in the event that the good lord decides to call me home ? Would they be strong enough to face the challenges ahead ? I do hope the Almighty grant them the grace and courage to love and be loved in this wonderful world, and move on with life.

As a man, I am no different compare to others. I am after all, also a common man with simple hope and aspiration. I love my family. They are my hope, my joy, and my sense of being. As a father, I hope my son will have a good career, marries a good woman, and have a happy family of his own. I also hope my 2 daughters have good husbands who will honour, respect, and give them the comfortable home. As for my wife, I hope she can continue to receive the blessings of the Almighty to live a comfortable life.

Come to think of it, maybe I was chosen to be inflicted with this illness because I am mentally, emotionally, and physically the strongest in the family. That, I am strong enough in all aspects to shoulder and withstand the difficulties ahead. If this is the criteria that made me the chosen one, then so be it. But I do hope the Almighty spared my siblings and family members from being inflicted with this dreaded disease again, ever.

My recent encounters of managing my health problem also made me realized that, it is indeed a very expensive affair to fall sick. I was indeed very lucky to be able to afford this expensive health care, but to average Malaysian, I doubt most of them will be as lucky as me. I do hope, there will be greater awareness and research into chronic and terminal diseases, to bring down the costs of treatment, and make it affordable to everybody. Of course, I also hope, in the not so distant future, chronic and terminal disease will be completely wipe off from the face of this earth, where humanity will no longer have to suffer from these unkind illnesses and diseases.

Whatever it is, I have faith in myself to regain my health. I know tomorrow will be a better day. I will claim my victory tomorrow, and one day at a time. On the other hand, I will also pray hard and stand ready to receive miracles.

Life goes on, and that's life................

人 生 自 古 誰 無 死, 留 取 丹 心 照 汗 青

Since time immemorial, which mortal man doesn't dies ? I shall leave behind my deeds and sincerity be the sparkles of history.......

No comments: