Sunday, May 03, 2009

The week that was.....

I checked out from Aenon Health Farm on Thursday morning. Overall, the past five days at Aenon has been an enjoying and relaxing experience. I did acquired a little bit more knowledge about becoming a vegan, how to prepare simple vegetarian dishes, nutritional values of fruits and vegetables, and some basic life style adjustments. Unbelievable !!! this carnivorous is on the verge of becoming a vegetarian. Do I look forward to plant based diet ? Why not ?

At the centre, one of the volunteer commented that I look positive and cheerful as a cancer patient. I don't know, maybe I am getting used to managing my health issues for the past few months. On a practical note, what choice do I have in dealing with this dreaded health issue ? Instead of self pity and living in fear, I might as well find means and ways to motivate myself to live life as it is, and happily. However, deep within me, I do have this occasional fights within me, trying to balance my daily fears and anxieties of the illness against the reality of my situation, and the need to be strong for myself and my family. Overall, I thank the Almighty for giving me the wisdom and grace to shoulder this emotional uncertainties. I accepted the fact that I am sick, but I will not give up my fight against this chronic illness. As much as I surrendered my life to the Almighty to dictate, I will also do all that within my capabilities to sustain my fight till my last breath. I know, with determination, I shall overcome, and I will recover from this unwelcome illness. I will not allow fears and uncertainties to hold me back to live life to the fullest.

At home on Friday, I had a rather relaxing time. Throughout the day, I was a little bit dozy and lazy, probably due to the relaxing pace of life during the previous few days. I was also quite happy to see my son's girlfriend, who came back for holiday from Indonesia.

On Saturday, I was attacked with another bout of severe pain at abdominal and back area. Although, my cancer marker is on a decreasing trend, but I do noticed, the bouts of pains are becoming quite frequent. I do hope my situation is not turning toward the worst. Being positive, I would like to treat these bouts of attack as healing crisis. And hopefully, the attacks tapper off eventually. My son and his girlfriend also accompany me to a medical supplies shop to buy an Infra Red Light Device to be used at home to relief my pain. So far, the penetrating warmness generated by the infrared light device does help to contain my pain to a certain extent.

Towards Sunday evening, the pain at the back subsided and the pain at the abdominal area became more manageable. I do hope I can have a good night sleep tonight ! It is rather irritating and uncomfortable to have disturbed sleeps caused by the random attack of pains over the previous few nights.

明天會更好. Praise the Lord. Good NiteZzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz......


irene said...

with loving thoughts n prayers from us all in chemor. take care.

Amy said...

Dearest uncle,
Just really want you to know that I admire your bravery & strength. And the way you radiates positive vibe really amazes me. May you stay strong uncle.

Anonymous said...

Dear Dalai Baru,
I had followed your posting for close to a year and have greatly admired your tenacity in combating the cancer in your body. I hesitated in commenting earlier as I thought you would have enough advice to keep you busy. I am now only suggesting that you look at another path to see whether it will help you in your fight. I am very convinced that there has to be a strong paradigm shift in your mind to help your body fight.In this regard, I am thinking of Vipassana meditation.When you are practising this form of meditation, the mind undergoes a profound transformation. I believe that it will be of help to you. Premier Lee Hsien Loong of Singapore practised it when he was being healed of cancer some time ago. Give it a try, it may relief you of the pain at the very least.
May you keep your mind positive and keep well.