Friday, November 10, 2006

Reflections of Life Journey

While having dinner this evening, my hand phone rang, the caller identification displayed an unfamiliar oversea number. I don't usually have business call during dinner time, and I don't expect any personal call either. I answered the call, a familiar voice from the other side of the line, somehow, my aging memory instantaneously identified the caller.

A friend that I have not spoken to since 1983 reappeared in my memory. More than 20 years had past. Times indeed passed us by. We came from the same hometown in Taiping, and attended the same university in Canada. Our youthful spirits then ventured us into Canada. As young men, we were unprepared for the new environment, but somehow, we adapted. We completed our undergraduate course. We went our separate way and never kept in touch.

It was indeed a nice emotional sensation to receive a call from this "long lost friend". We talked for sometimes, exchange email addresses and Skype ID's, and make a tentative appointment to meet in December. I do look forward to receive this friend.

Come to think of it, the past 20 years or so has been an eventful journey. I have my ups and downs during the previous 20 years, Along the way. I made my money, and I have also lost all my money. I nurtured and brought a few friends up, but I was also betrayed when the people I brought up attempt to bring me down. I have my proudest moments and achievements, but I also have my failures and misfortunes. Indeed life is full of surprises. Life is indeed like a cup of coffee, it can be sweet, bitter, or addictive. You never really know the outcome, until you take a sip and finished the cup.

Through the grace of the Almighty, the support of some good friends, and the encouragements and unconditional sacrifices of my family, I overcame all the oddities of life. In short, I have been through worst of times, and the best of times. Life is after all an investment in times. There is really no profits to reap. We are merely reinvesting our times in the hope of having better times ahead. I guess we will just keep repeat the reinvestment process until we breathe our last breath. Perhaps, it is about time, in our eagerness to have better times ahead, we should also learn to divest some times to enjoy the presence.

Looking back, along the path that I walked, I did accumulated a lot of baggages of emotional natures and of personal commitments. The burdens of carrying these baggages along the remaining path that I need to walk, is at times, getting a bit heavy. I am not what I used to be, those carefree days are gone. Like my parents before me, there are responsibilities I need to see through, and there are commitments I need to fulfilled. Sigh, sigh... For better or for worst, life is really not about personal fulfillments. It is what we are expected to do to reciprocate the good deeds done to us.

Looking within and knowing myself, the personal baggages will definitely get heavier as I walk through the path that I have to walk. But do I really have a choice to discard the unnecessary baggages and walk a lighter path ? Honestly, I do not think I have the wisdom to make that decision. I would definitely want to face life commitment with certain balance of emotional and material maturity. Life is only complete if we take the good's and bad's together. How can I appreciate good foods if I have never tasted bad food ? How do I know sweetness if I have never tasted bitterness ? I would take what ever that comes along, the good and the bad, and let life take its course. For whatever it may be, I shall try my best to glee rather then flee. Of course, there will be times it will become unbearable and wanting to explode with rages and expressive. But I shall try my best to act like an actor on the stage. I shall try my best not to leave emotional scars to people surrounding me.

For whatever it is, my sincere feeling is, I do need to find a balance. A balance of personal fulfillments and personal responsibilities. I shall try my best not to change the course into the extreme. My good friend used to tell me, there is no point having so much money but no time to enjoy yourself. And, it is equally bad to have all the good times for yourself but not sharing with people surrounding you,

On a lighter side, sometimes, Life is also like having sex. There is no point looking at your rod everyday fantasizing about your sexual capabilities or incapabilities. It doesn't really matter whether you have big rod or short rod. As long as the rod can get into the hole. it is a good rod. Try to enjoy it and not over indulged in it. Try to have feeling in it and not to over obsessed with your performance. Believe me, you and your partner will definitely have a mutually emotional and sexually fulfilling session.

Well, it is a bit late now. Got to go to bed to recharge my battery and get myself ready for tomorrow. Good niteZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.

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